all my life, i have been wanting to be with the right one and now that he comes along, i have this overwhelming fear...  fear of what?  i dont really know but i know that im afraid...  why?  its funny how i cant seem to take that leap for the right one???  life is full of surprises, twists and turns, ups and downs...  over the past few months (actually at the start of this year) i have seem myself morphing into a different person, more of a woman...  i know myself more...  and slowly im letting go of all of my unfounded fears and am starting to reach out to what i want...  its not easy to step out of my box but im taking it one step at a time, day by day...  now i know that in this life, all we really have is ourselves...  whatever makes us happy, go for it!  like what cielo told me, dont be bothered by things beyond your control, whats the point right?!?!?  at the start of this year, a very special person walked in my life and i am so thankful for that... what i was expecting to be play turned out to be more -- life changing in fact...  i am in a situation right now that i am not proud of, i cant say that its right, slowly im trying to correct things...  its not right but i think that i need (needed) this to grow and what growth it was...  all i can say right now is that we only have ourselves and lets not be afraid of the things that will make you happy...  lets not look too much into the future coz today has its own problems... just enjoy what we have right now...  at least one day we can look back and say, i had that...  rather than i didnt have it... or i let it pass me by, why?  because we were scared!??!  not worth it...  right now im living by the day and hoping that what i picture in my head will become my reality...